According to experts, Strict parenting can turn children into adept liars as they do not feel safe telling the truth.
Psychotherapist Philippa Perry says,
“A child should not be sole to blame for lying as the parenting style has a big impact on their ability and readiness to fib. If a child lies to get out of trouble then that lie is not all down to the child.It’s a co-created situation. The atmosphere has been produced whereby the child does not feel safe telling the truth. So you can’t condemn the child for lying. “We do our kids no favours at all when we persecute them for lying. We can be curious about the lie, we can be interested in it and look at our part in it. But being draconian and rigid about it is not going to make a situation better and change our kid’s mentality .”
Canadian psychologist VictoriaTalwar who is a renowned expert on children’s social-cognitive development at McGill University with her colleagues developed a test designed to identify effective young liars called the “Peeping Game.”
How the game was played-
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Two schools in West Africa, one with stricter rules and the other with a more laid back approach were gathered in a room.
People are asked to identify the objects by sound only , with the last one bearing no correlation to what it looks like.
The researchers then left the room and in return asked the children what the object was, and if they peeked.
Talwar found that the number of students from the relaxed school who lied and told the truth was roughly on par with studies from other schools. But those from the strict school were quick to lie, and did it “very effectively“.
Here lies the truth –
Children with more of a liberal, independence-fostering mother or father are likely to grow into well-adjusted adults. The best parenting was characterized by high expectations that children would act with the maturity befitting their age. There is also a hidden benefit behind lying that If your children lie, and they lie well, they are likely to grow up to be intelligent and successful. They can separate fact and fiction in their heads better than most.
It is advisable to parents to treat their toddlers lightly . Show warmth towards them have effective communication so that you don’t slip the little genius from your hands.